It makes me feel like an awful person when I think about it.. but I HATE her.. I hate her more than any other... So obstinate, rude, selfish, infinitely dishonest, hypocritical, abusive, and many other things words cannot describe. She cares for no one else, even if she says she does. She'll say, "I love you." but then doesn't have the decency to stop doing things you repeatedly ask her not to. I tell her, I cannot forgive you, every word you say feels thick and fake, full of malice, so I want nothing to do with you. Yet STILL she proceeds to try and force herself on me. I'm almost 18! It's time to let me go! I've hated her for years and years.. the only reason she never kicked me out it because she knew I WANTED her to. We argued almost every day, countless bloody noses, countless threats, and when I would finally only laugh at her, after it's all gotten old, meaningless, and I realize she can't do anything more to me, she punished me by banning me from seeing my boyfriend, because "I was acting 12, and 12 year olds don't get to date." I was aloud to do everything else, ANYTHING, except see him. I told her she couldn't keep me from him, she said that if he came to my house she'd make him leave, and if he wouldn't, she'd place a restraining order on him so we couldn't be together. She wouldn't let me go to see him either. But being her, she KNEW I had NOTHING else. I had 2 friends, at the time, one of which was him, and the other quit coming to visit because she hates HER as well... She knew how much he means, how much I need him, and she only did it trying to punish and hurt me... make me alone... I was with him for 2 years at the time, and she claimed to like him. YOU DO NOT TARGET SOMEONE'S HEART, EVER! BE IT FOR CONTROL, TO "WIN" THE ARGUMENT, OR ANYTHING OF THE LIKE. THOSE ARE ALL MALICIOUS, SELF-SERVING REASONS! She played games with my head, told me things that made me hate my dad... wouldn't let me speak to him and so I blindly listened with only one side of the story. I can admit that now. Though I know at least one of the things she said was true, and I know one of her suspicions was not unfounded, I also know that if she would of trusted my dad, had been willing to listen to his side of the story, that suspicion would of fallen to pieces. Nothing she says anymore is true. I haven't heard her speak the truth about even the littlest things in a VERY long time. You can tell when she's lying, even if you don't know the facts to prove it, because she lies so often, you get used to it. When she says something, and you know other-wise, for sure, then says something else with the same tone, same eyes, same phrasing, same mannerisms, and it gives you the same feeling.. you know. She makes things up to hurt people, to get her way. It's ALL about her, and if she has to hurt others, so be it. She filed a fake police report saying that my dad came and beat her up at 3am one night. Which I know isn't true, because we were living a small house, and it would of been impossible for me not to hear him, or see him leave. I was awake until 4am, and saw him sleeping soundly in bed. The strange thing is, she had bumps, cuts, and bruises... WHAT KIND OF PERSON HURTS THEM SELF TO TRY AND BLAME SOMEONE THAT THEY CLAIM TO HAVE LOVED FOR SO LONG!?!? THE PERSON THAT YOU HAVE KIDS WITH!?!? THE PERSON THAT LOVED YOU! THE PERSON THAT PROVIDED FOR YOU, TRIED TO HELP YOU GET BETTER WHEN YOU WERE DOWN! HOW COULD YOU DO THAT WHEN THERE IS NO WAY THAT YOUR KIDS WOULDN'T FIND OUT?!? HOW COULD YOU DO THAT WHEN IT DOES NOTHING BUT HURT?!? IT HURTS HER, AND EVERYONE AROUND, IT DOES NO GOOD! WHAT KIND OF PERSON DOES SOMETHING THAT IS PURELY BAD?!?
I HATE YOU.... IF YOU SEE THIS BY SOME OF YOUR OBSESSIVE PRYING, PUSHING, PLOTTING, AND PROBABLY STALKING, KNOW THAT I MEAN IT, ALMOST AS MUCH AS I MEAN IT WHEN I SAY I LOVE HIM... I FEEL SATISFACTION TO THINK THAT I'VE BEEN WITH HIM NEARLY 4 YEARS NOW, AND THAT MY RELATIONSHIP WITH HIM HAS OUTLASTED YOU. IT ALWAYS WILL. YOU CANNOT GET IN THE WAY. YOU CANNOT HURT ME ANYMORE. YOU AND I ARE DONE WEATHER YOU LIKE IT OR NOT.
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