Kingdom of Knuffel

Ah, gotcha. Well, That's good then!

Tell him he hurt your feelings! I feel like that's mean to call someone else immature to have kids so soon. If you feel you are ready. You're probably ready.

Just remember, money is a big a factor. So start saving up!!

It was a few days ago that he said it, so I feel if I'll tell him now that he hurt my feelings he'll say I drag things up from the past instead of telling him immediately...

I think he recognized it hurt me but Idunno.

Yeah, saving up is the problem here. I'm between jobs right now and he borrowed a ton of money to his stepdad, so I'm like... why are you sabotaging our savings?!

We had almost half of what we needed to take a loan for an apartment and we're back to almost nothing thanks to that

It's a good thing my savings are still on the same level and don't melt down yet. But if I don't find something soon, it might change.

If he says that then tell him you weren't ready to talk about it at the time, but now you are ready.

That's his own problem if he can't accept that.

Oh, yikes. >__< That's tough. Loaning out money to people is always a touchy subject.
Is your boyfriend working?

hope everyone is doing okay!

this is probably the stupidest vent ~ i love/hate unique knuffles D:
It makes me upset as heck cause I don't have millions of FP like certain members do and as a collector it kills to not have them all XD

okay vent over phew

so... really feeling the need to vent...
but since I'm not used to posting things like this online, I will be puting it under as a 'spoiler'

Spoiler

so, in a moment of weakness I asked a dr about seeing a therapist. I had just lost one of my fur-kids, and I couldn't handle the loss emotionally added on with the on-going chronic pain I've been experiencing.
but I'm super frustrated. the therapist I've been assigned to through this clinic seems to work under the concept of emotions=pain, pain=emotions. basically that if I'm in pain and something happens that's calming/relaxing/happy that my pain should go down by default, where that is not the case, and I have stated that many times.
in this latest appointment alone I talked about how when I draw it can be very calming, since drawing can be a very calming hobby-thing. so he kept pushing saying that "since it was calming it must lower physical pain levels" and I continuously told him that's not what happens (I would know, since I've been going through issues for so long...). it also came up that when hanging out with my fur-kids, rats, that they make me feel happy when I'm hanging out with them, even if I have them on my lap with my pain at an unbearable level, which he then kept insisting my pain must have lowered due to my rats making me happy and/or amused by their crazy antics. he would not listen when I told him my pain does NOT go down in these cases and dismissed it as us "butting heads".

it also bothers me that asides from the "pain and emotions are the same thing" opinion he carries. he tried to suggest that my left lung collapsing was psychosomatic, seemingly disregarding the factor that my right lung has collapsed multiple times and that it's a physical issue with my health, not a mental issue. along with he will compare me to other patients, saying that everyone else he sees are so angry they shout and yell or cry and sob when they speak to him. even comparing me to another "rat-person" he met who had a completely differing personality than me... and he says these things as though he doesn't realize that not -everyone- is hot tempered. not -everyone- cries/sobs while talking about things. not -all- rat owners are identical. everyone is different.

I feel like I have more to rant about... but I cannot think of anything else atm... and this is probably long enough as it is....

JamBerry IceCream wrote:If he says that then tell him you weren't ready to talk about it at the time, but now you are ready.

That's his own problem if he can't accept that.

Oh, yikes. >__< That's tough. Loaning out money to people is always a touchy subject.
Is your boyfriend working?

Sorry for the late reply QAQ
I ended up trying to brush it off, as always

Didn't tell him. There's no point in discussions right now.

Yes, he's working, with a good salary too, but he's got some minor debts of his own, while he was loaning his money to his step-dad... who's in ginormous debt since forever...

He promised to never ever give him any money after he got so angry and calculated how much he gave him and he even cried a bit... because we'd be some half-way down to getting that mortgage loan...

jadepanda-ai wrote:so... really feeling the need to vent...
but since I'm not used to posting things like this online, I will be puting it under as a 'spoiler'

Spoiler
so, in a moment of weakness I asked a dr about seeing a therapist. I had just lost one of my fur-kids, and I couldn't handle the loss emotionally added on with the on-going chronic pain I've been experiencing.
but I'm super frustrated. the therapist I've been assigned to through this clinic seems to work under the concept of emotions=pain, pain=emotions. basically that if I'm in pain and something happens that's calming/relaxing/happy that my pain should go down by default, where that is not the case, and I have stated that many times.
in this latest appointment alone I talked about how when I draw it can be very calming, since drawing can be a very calming hobby-thing. so he kept pushing saying that "since it was calming it must lower physical pain levels" and I continuously told him that's not what happens (I would know, since I've been going through issues for so long...). it also came up that when hanging out with my fur-kids, rats, that they make me feel happy when I'm hanging out with them, even if I have them on my lap with my pain at an unbearable level, which he then kept insisting my pain must have lowered due to my rats making me happy and/or amused by their crazy antics. he would not listen when I told him my pain does NOT go down in these cases and dismissed it as us "butting heads".

it also bothers me that asides from the "pain and emotions are the same thing" opinion he carries. he tried to suggest that my left lung collapsing was psychosomatic, seemingly disregarding the factor that my right lung has collapsed multiple times and that it's a physical issue with my health, not a mental issue. along with he will compare me to other patients, saying that everyone else he sees are so angry they shout and yell or cry and sob when they speak to him. even comparing me to another "rat-person" he met who had a completely differing personality than me... and he says these things as though he doesn't realize that not -everyone- is hot tempered. not -everyone- cries/sobs while talking about things. not -all- rat owners are identical. everyone is different.

I feel like I have more to rant about... but I cannot think of anything else atm... and this is probably long enough as it is....

If you don't click with this therapist, you should ask for someone else to be assigned to you. You have the right to change a therapist if you don't feel comfortable with them for any reason.
Also, rat owner high-five, I have two girls, they're driving me nuts

memoriam wrote:
JamBerry IceCream wrote:If he says that then tell him you weren't ready to talk about it at the time, but now you are ready.

That's his own problem if he can't accept that.

Oh, yikes. >__< That's tough. Loaning out money to people is always a touchy subject.
Is your boyfriend working?
Sorry for the late reply QAQ
I ended up trying to brush it off, as always Didn't tell him. There's no point in discussions right now.

Yes, he's working, with a good salary too, but he's got some minor debts of his own, while he was loaning his money to his step-dad... who's in ginormous debt since forever... He promised to never ever give him any money after he got so angry and calculated how much he gave him and he even cried a bit... because we'd be some half-way down to getting that mortgage loan...

jadepanda-ai wrote:so... really feeling the need to vent...
but since I'm not used to posting things like this online, I will be puting it under as a 'spoiler'

Spoiler
so, in a moment of weakness I asked a dr about seeing a therapist. I had just lost one of my fur-kids, and I couldn't handle the loss emotionally added on with the on-going chronic pain I've been experiencing.
but I'm super frustrated. the therapist I've been assigned to through this clinic seems to work under the concept of emotions=pain, pain=emotions. basically that if I'm in pain and something happens that's calming/relaxing/happy that my pain should go down by default, where that is not the case, and I have stated that many times.
in this latest appointment alone I talked about how when I draw it can be very calming, since drawing can be a very calming hobby-thing. so he kept pushing saying that "since it was calming it must lower physical pain levels" and I continuously told him that's not what happens (I would know, since I've been going through issues for so long...). it also came up that when hanging out with my fur-kids, rats, that they make me feel happy when I'm hanging out with them, even if I have them on my lap with my pain at an unbearable level, which he then kept insisting my pain must have lowered due to my rats making me happy and/or amused by their crazy antics. he would not listen when I told him my pain does NOT go down in these cases and dismissed it as us "butting heads".

it also bothers me that asides from the "pain and emotions are the same thing" opinion he carries. he tried to suggest that my left lung collapsing was psychosomatic, seemingly disregarding the factor that my right lung has collapsed multiple times and that it's a physical issue with my health, not a mental issue. along with he will compare me to other patients, saying that everyone else he sees are so angry they shout and yell or cry and sob when they speak to him. even comparing me to another "rat-person" he met who had a completely differing personality than me... and he says these things as though he doesn't realize that not -everyone- is hot tempered. not -everyone- cries/sobs while talking about things. not -all- rat owners are identical. everyone is different.

I feel like I have more to rant about... but I cannot think of anything else atm... and this is probably long enough as it is....
If you don't click with this therapist, you should ask for someone else to be assigned to you. You have the right to change a therapist if you don't feel comfortable with them for any reason.
Also, rat owner high-five, I have two girls, they're driving me nuts

thanks for the advice
I ended up just cancelling the appointments in general, since they didn't help at all and just caused tons of stress. but I also don't really feel like I need it at this point.

oh nice! I've got three rattie-girls myself. they're the best!

I am so damn sick of my backyard neighbor. He thinks he can tell us what we can and can't do with our own property, like trying to intimidate our plumbing company out of completing out french drain in the back yard. Hello dude, it doesn't matter if we run the end of the pipe to the corner of our yard towards the city culvert, our property sits higher than yours does so all the water from our property is going to drain onto yours anyway!

Now he has called the cops on us for our dogs playing in their own backyard, claiming their play barking is, and I quote, "interfering with his peace of mind in his own home". That was a a seventy five dollar ticket. So we spent three thousand dollars on a privacy fence to block our dogs view of the street and surrounding yards to try and cut down on them seeing things they might bark at.

And I'm STILL paranoid he's gonna call the cops on us again. I really really hope he moves away soon.

I feel so exhausted all of the time. I spend 40 hours working each week (more if you count the drive to and from). Feels like I don't have any time to do anything. There are so many sites I want to be on to post in. Trying to do so many things at once, but no time in the day. I also want to spend time with my husband and kids and cook and bake, but I just feel too tired.
The company will be closing the store down about the end of January, so I guess I will have a bit of a break coming up. Still, not having income from a job is rough. Gotta re-apply to all kinds of things now. That's always such an annoying process. Plus I have to worry if one of the things on my background will show up on there. With me being manager at the store currently, I am hoping to find something else within the same ranking and pay, but don't know if there is anything good like that where I am currently located. Plus, all the work from it is pretty exhausting itself. So much to do and remember all the time. It feels like it is never ending.
And even with what I currently am making, we can't seem to be able to save up any money extra for savings. -sigh-
Life is just rough sometimes and adulting is hard.

My parents need to fucking chill. Their twenty-year-old daughter can think for herself, thank you very much.

Kingdom of Knuffel

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