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Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Dec 23rd, '09, 21:40
by violethearts97
I don't want to physically be around people. I just want to be left alone. Is that so wrong? I feel like a horrible person for withdrawing like this, but what I desire most is to have the freedom to explore my own mind and possibilities without the demand, bias, and insincerity of others. I just want someone who will except me for me.
Everyone is trying to make me into who they want me to be and they only seem to talk to me when they want something. However, when I have a problem, they're suddenly too busy, or worse, they just pretend to give a crap without actually seeming to care.
I guess part of this desire for solitude is from my anxiety disorder. I'm literally afraid of people. I really like to help people, but it's hard to be around them. I'm really conflicted.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Dec 26th, '09, 07:11
by Megami
I sometimes worry that my difficulty with hating people who do awful things to me and the people around me effects my ability to actually love the people I care about the most.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Dec 31st, '09, 15:44
by Brootal Barbie
I think I suffer form an undiagnosed emotional disorder, or something along the lines. I constantly think that there is someone else inside my head, I talk and reply to myself constantly and I think that ever one's trying to kill me, and I've been drawn to the occlusion that I should kill/harm that person because of it. I don't trust anyone anymore, and I'd rather never have any human contact again in my life. So I try to make people hate me, I try to be as horrible to my parent and peer's as I can be, without physically harming
them, but it just doesn't work. I'm scared to tell anyone because I know they won't accept me, or will try to change me.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Dec 31st, '09, 18:48
by mercu
Sometimes I wish I could just disappear from the lives and memories of certain people because knowing them, being known by them can be a burden and I'm too much of a coward to say it to them.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 3rd, '10, 03:51
by Awen Moonshine
My auntie has moved back in with my nan so if i get kicked out of the place i'm staying then i've now got nowhere i could go back to... Not only that but it also means that her and my uncle are not together anymore after being married for about 8 years... I don't know what to do... I've just had to spend a week with my family, pretending to be happy and now that i'm home again i'm starting to have suicidal tendancies again... I'm worried for my safety and worried that my control on the other personalities is weakening... I feel like i don't know who i am anymore...
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 4th, '10, 11:40
by absynthe
For the first time in these past three years . . . I feel utterly useless and alone.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 4th, '10, 13:00
by Edea Sorceress
Why is it so hard sometimes to ignore the stupidity of some people? D=
I want to kill something.
Ah well.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 8th, '10, 08:30
by giraffie
I'm just too tired.
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 8th, '10, 15:43
by Tortilla Bandit
I am so terrified of the future. I don't feel any different now than when I was twelve. If something terrible were to happen, I don't know what I'd do.
Also, I'm still in the anime closet
Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Jan 13th, '10, 02:21
by OrangeCookie
I had depression once.
i was addicted to drugs ("technically" XD) they were children multi vitamins XDXDXD
i was addicted to porn once