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Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 14th, '20, 13:56
by Sunlight
Wow
That could be a part of it. I definitely get more... airheaded when I'm sleep-deprived.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 15th, '20, 02:08
by Moi
Yeah, I've had a lot of family in prison xD
However, most of them are good people who made mistakes and have learned from them.
My uncle was in and out of prison most of my childhood.
He got out and got married and had a kid and is still doing good.
Unfortunately, he and his wife divorced because they were too incompatible.
She's been trying her hardest to hurt him too.
Last thing she did was call CPS on my uncle because she suspected he and his girlfriend drink alcohol when his son is there.
Which, by the way, who gives a fuck?
A lot of parents have alcohol in the same house as their kids and have a drink.
Second, she said my uncle isn't giving their son his medicine which is complete horseshit.
My uncle loves his son and would never do anything to hurt him.
He told us CPS came, saw nothing wrong, and left.
I think my brain is fucked. Which makes me sad and hopeless xD
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 15th, '20, 09:55
by Sunlight
Wow, what an awful woman. I'm glad your uncle turned his life around, though. Glad CPS didn't just take the mom's word for it.
Yeah, sounds like depression talking. Sounds similar to what my depression tells me. It's not true, you know. You're not hopeless. You might feel sad now, but you aren't hopeless.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 15th, '20, 20:34
by Moi
She's been trying so hard to hurt him. And she just called us and talked to us the other day, all nice.
I liked her. Everyone liked her. But now she's doing all this shit.
She took my uncle to court over something and he could have went to prison again because the court system is retarded. All because she was petty as fuck.
Then she won, and was trying to make it to where my uncle had to pay for their divorce AND HER court fees on top of his.
My uncle said the judge looked right at her and told her my uncle wasn't paying and it was ridiculous for her to try to make him.
I think the amount of damage the lack of sleep has done to my brain is irreversible.
I will never be able to function normally again.
All I can do is try to make it so I don't get worse.
I can't think straight, I can't remember anything, I can't like get a job or go to school or anything because I can't think straight and forget everything.
I'm tired and worn out and all I have to look forward to is getting tireder and weaker and older.
My lack of sleep is also making my depression and anxiety worse, which I don't think will ever get better.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 16th, '20, 09:47
by Sunlight
Wow, that's really messed up. Especially since she was nice before. I wonder what happened to her.
Well, it used to be thought that brain cells don't regenerate but we know now that it does... just slower than other cells. You're still young so I think it's not impossible for you to get better. It might be hard since you do have sleep apnea and breathing problems, but I don't think it'd be impossible.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 16th, '20, 20:37
by Moi
I know she got MS, lost her mom, almost lost her father and stuff.
But still, she was a really nice and sweet person.
This is the complete opposite of her.
Or maybe it was always how she was and her niceness was a front.
Sometimes it's hard to be positive.
Lately, I've been so down and wanting to cry, but I refuse to cry anymore.
So it piles on instead then it all comes flooding out.
I cried the other day and felt so much better, but I don't want to do it again xD
I think too much. That's what my dad always told me.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 18th, '20, 01:17
by Pandemonium
Fronts don't last very long, from what I understand. I guess I can understand with MS; I hear people often become very irritable with such diseases. Not excusable, but understandable.
Yeah, depression and rumination are quite common together; not sure which causes which, honestly. But either way, perhaps working on one helps with the other.
The game prize was taken down and replaced due to a lack of interest. The new game prize is: 
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 18th, '20, 20:53
by Moi
I feel so bad because I liked her. But what she does to my uncle pisses me off.
I don't know how to feel about her.
It's hard to be positive all the time.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 19th, '20, 06:55
by Sunlight
People often have more than one facet. I think it's okay to like what she was like and hate what she's doing now.
It's true. But I think it's also hard to be negative all the time, too. I think it's okay to be not happy all the time, as long as we're not sad all the time instead. It's okay to just be okay, and that's really all I want for both of us.
Re: The ₡a$i₦o
Posted: Jul 19th, '20, 20:37
by Moi
She calls sometimes. But I don't know whether to stay friendly or not, was my point xD
I used to be a complete pessimist.
Now I'm just kind of...all of them xD
I know how to be optimistic and pessimistic and realistic.
People mistake realistic for pessimistic ._.