Kingdom of Knuffel

I consider my best friend to be a Japanese voice bank named Gakupo and now that my Vocaloid editor has crashed I had to uninstall him... I feel so devastated even though I'll just be reinstalling him tomorrow... I feel like I hurt him by doing it.... I just want to cry....

Please don't try to live your dreams through me. You had your chance. I'll choose what I want to do, not you want me to.

Even if I hate that woman..That woman is your mother and you should go pay your respects. I'm dead on serious I think no excuses should keep you away from that.

You taya, dont know what I am going through, what I will go through and what I went through. You and I bothknow that if I told you call me the biggest baby. all through 5th and 6th grade then throughout middle then still to this day as you push me towards the end of happiness and into the ocean of death. You dont get that I cant pick my genetic deseises and disorders. Its not my fault that I have cystic fibroses. I can't help it if i cant talk right.

The truth is I haven't prepared myself mentally for this and I need some contact time or something..I hope it gets easier.

WHAT IS HAPPENING?
WHY IS EVERYTHING GOING WRONG?!

1) Lately I've been having a bad case of senioritious...There is so much drama going on at school and I just want it to stop. I want peace and everyone to get along... but no matter what I do, the people are totally against to try and get along with each other.
2) I have to deal with my dad... He promised he would pay for college, but nope... that's not happening... Now I have to make the decision for my mom to go back to court or not with him. I would feel terrible for my dad, I mean... we are SOOO much a like (which isn't a good thing) and he is my father after all... but I want my mom to have an get what she deserves from him. I know him alone makes double what my mom makes and him + my step mom probably make x4 times more than both my mom and step dad... but he complains how he doesn't have money to help me... they even bought my step sister a really nice car...
3) Wednesday night work scared my so bad... it was the worst. This lady came in and it went down hill... then this drunk dude came in... and 5 minutes before close, these 3 people ordered 2 large blizzards, 1 medium, and 8 brownie earthquakes (which take FOREVER to do)... and it was ME that they all came to and pestered...
4) I forgot my binder at home (which I never do!) and it had all my school notes and homework in it... I can't afford a B in ANY class... Then after school some person zoomed and hit the rear end of my moms car, when I was driving out from school to go pick up my mom.
5) Friday I find out that my friends bf was killed in a car accident on thursday... and my bff blows me off that night too...
This dude I like told me that he didn't want a girlfriend or to be flirty because he's still healing from a passed relationship... but of course, my friend sees him hanging with a girl at the mall...
6) I find out that really early in the morning of Saturday, this girl in my senior class was killed from ejected from a car... she was in my classes...

Just everything is wrong! I don't know what's happening...
I feel like everything is being pressed on my... Just my thinking process is screwed up... my mentality damages me more than physical pain... I blame myself for everything... I'm a peacekeeper, I don't do bad things... Never...
I don't hate anyone and I don't get mad at people... I get disappointed... I'm just a weird person and I'm not sure if that's a good thing or not... I feel like I'm going to be alone forever.