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Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Jan 17th, '24, 14:39
by chuunibyou
Thank you Zia, your words comforted me immensely
She isn't going to give me what was promised to me: my dreams come true, doing what I love for work, a secure future. Since she's going to continue denying it to me, despite once offering it to me, I'll have to let it go. It's what I have been trying to do for over a year, and it was the loss of this that triggered my depression in the first place.
When I was trying to search for a dream to replace the one I lost, and work that would bring me as much joy as that would have, I didn't... find anything. Job-searching is a hellhole and it felt like what she offered me, and then denied, was the only good thing that would ever come my way.
But I can't keep living like that anymore. I have to find an alternate path to happiness. I haven't found it yet but I need to have faith that I won't be lost forever. Depression makes it difficult to do so, but your virtual hugs give me a little more courage to keep going
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Jan 23rd, '24, 00:23
by memoriam
I procrastinated too much with the work I supposedly like and now I'm suffering the consequences. I need to get a grip on myself and be more responsible. I'm proud that at least I'm not making excuses for my actions. I try to own my mistakes and keep a note to self that the procrastination wasn't worth it
I'll be better next time. That's a promise to myself.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Feb 6th, '24, 20:09
by Snipehunt
Reached the point in my mental health where I've lost the energy to write, either on my own or even low effort roleplay. The later especially was my biggest form of stress relief, an easy way to spend time with friends in a way that made me feel 'useful', but now I'm plagued with thoughts to isolate and struggle to explain things without speaking in ways that hurt myself and others. I'm tired, I want to go back to last year when I had confidence again, because now I'm scared to talk to any of my loved ones after lashing out one too many times.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Feb 7th, '24, 18:59
by AutobotDen
TW: Medical, narrowly-avoided death
Spoiler
So, Dad had debridement done on his feet on Thursday. Friday he started complaining that his ankle hurt and he couldn't even stand without assistance. The weekend was miserable. Monday morning, home health care stopped by, and his INH number was high, so we had to go to the hospital. His surgeon was there, and saw him, and it turns out the tissue that he (the surgeon) thought was healthy on Thursday was all necrotized and black.
Dad got transferred to the ER to be transferred to the med center in the nearest city, and surgery that night. If we'd had waited 'til the next day, He would've died. His foot was amputated above the ankle then, and revision surgery is tomorrow, the 8th. He's going to be transferred to a skilled care facility after he recovers a bit.
ETA: So, the 8th didn't happen. it got postponed to this past Sunday, because there were concerns over Dad's condition. Revision surgery happened, and it turns out Dad's heart has 15-20% function, so they're going to do a procedure to shock his heart to try and increase the function. The sibling flew in on Monday, and will be leaving this coming Sunday. He's been up to see dad daily.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Apr 7th, '24, 18:32
by Bear Witch
I have no idea what I should do and it's driving me crazy.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Apr 12th, '24, 07:08
by AutobotDen
TW: Medical, Palliative Care
Spoiler
Dad had to be taken up to Omaha. He was in the ER earlier because he had a blood clot in his stump. They operated and removed it, but we're going to have to look into palliative care for him, because once he's healthy enough to, the doctor's going to amputate his right leg above the knee, and Mom and I are both convinced he won't be coming home at all anymore.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Apr 28th, '24, 11:21
by Bear Witch
Well, I know what to do now but I don't want to do it.
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: Apr 28th, '24, 15:12
by PastelWitch
The cost of living is making me depressed
Re: Do you need to vent?
Posted: May 8th, '24, 05:58
by chuunibyou
I just want to figure out how to be happy. I've been continuously getting hurt instead whenever I try, but I can't stop now. I can't stay like this. I have to keep trying and hope that at some point life will work out for me.