Avatar Shopping Community Knuffel Quests Donate My Account Help

Jump to:

   [ 2495 posts ] 
  • 1
  • 159
  • 160
  • 161
  • 162
  • 163
  • 250
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 20th, '14, 02:25    


ραριℓℓση ηιтєѕ

Joined: Feb 15th, '12, 04:32
Posts: 148
Hugs: 7422
Mood:
I hate that you let him talk about your children like they are trash.
I hate even more that you agree with him.
I hate that you allow him to treat you like garbage just because he pleasures you.
I'm tired of him slamming things and screaming and acting like a five year old.
I hate your boyfriend, mom.
I love you...you are my mother...but I hate you for poisoning our lives with him.

(0) (0)
♡ ✂ ♔ s ρ σ σ к ү ρ я ι η c ε s s ♔ ✂ ♡
Santa, that's my only wish this year~
Formerly || zσяуα
||


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 20th, '14, 04:06    


Fire

Joined: May 31st, '09, 14:54
Posts: 5595
Hugs: 109721
Mood: Back in my home country for the first time in 2.5 years.
Location: Wherever the wind takes me...
What does it mean that all of my fears and insecurities only hurt me when I'm alone?
Why is it that, whenever I'm with you, they suddenly dissapear?
Every night, I crumble under the weight of the stress. But when I see you the next day, I can't even bring myself to tell you what's bothering me, 'cause the second I'm with you, all my fears just melt away.
I can't even tell anymore if all of those things are actually bothering me, or if my brain just likes to torture me when I'm alone and defenseless.
I just wish I could move in with you already. Then we'd be together all the time, and I'd always feel okay.
I hate being so dependent on you.
But if I had to rely on anyone in this world, I'm glad it's you.
You're the only one I feel safe with anymore. The only one I can truly rely on. The only one I can be myself around. The only one who won't let me down. The only one who will put my feelings before their own. The only one who cares enough to listen when my own body makes me sick.
I love you. That much I know.
I just wish I didn't feel so confused and conflicted.

(0) (0)
╰☆╮
Market |||Selling Forum
Image
123x Paper Airplane 1x Holy Light23x TikiTaki Mask
╰☆╮


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 20th, '14, 23:57    


moonlight_sonata

Joined: Oct 21st, '10, 01:54
Posts: 1568
Hugs: 37623
Mood: Feeling bleh
Location: Doesn't matter >=)
Not sure why I feel like crying ? Random feeling out of no where just hit me. I better get my ass into dancing off my fat ate to much ice cream sandwich and I'm feeling ugly. I can't fall back to the bad habits of mine. Why does food have to taste so good ?

(0) (0)


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 00:37    


Fire

Joined: May 31st, '09, 14:54
Posts: 5595
Hugs: 109721
Mood: Back in my home country for the first time in 2.5 years.
Location: Wherever the wind takes me...
I just feel so hopeless...

(0) (0)
╰☆╮
Market |||Selling Forum
Image
123x Paper Airplane 1x Holy Light23x TikiTaki Mask
╰☆╮


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 00:49    


Fire

Joined: May 31st, '09, 14:54
Posts: 5595
Hugs: 109721
Mood: Back in my home country for the first time in 2.5 years.
Location: Wherever the wind takes me...
Life just seems more and more like something I have to persevere through, rather than something to enjoy.
I know I only get one life. And I know that I should enjoy it. But I'm just miserable all the time.
I hate where I'm at currently. All I do is work, and worry about work, and worry about the future.
But the future looks just as bleak.
I don't think I'll ever be truly happy.
I just want to be able to relax and enjoy life. But how can I, when I've got a whole life full of commitments and tasks to complete?
I just don't see the point in it anymore.
Maybe I should just give up....

(0) (0)
╰☆╮
Market |||Selling Forum
Image
123x Paper Airplane 1x Holy Light23x TikiTaki Mask
╰☆╮


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 01:04    


Fire

Joined: May 31st, '09, 14:54
Posts: 5595
Hugs: 109721
Mood: Back in my home country for the first time in 2.5 years.
Location: Wherever the wind takes me...
I was suicidal for 6 years.
Then I met you, and everything was okay again.
I finally had something that I wanted to live for.
Instead of just feeling guilty for hurting my friends and family by leaving.
It's been 18 and a half months since then.
There's been a handful of times that I've felt it since.
But it was manageable.
I finally felt like I was okay again.
But tonight it came back.
And I don't know what to do.
I am too much of a wimp to do it. But I don't want to exist anymore, either.
I don't know what I'm more afraid of: facing another 6 years of the thought of suicide lurking around every corner, or finally being brave enough to actually do something about it.

(0) (0)
╰☆╮
Market |||Selling Forum
Image
123x Paper Airplane 1x Holy Light23x TikiTaki Mask
╰☆╮


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 03:37    


moonlight_sonata

Joined: Oct 21st, '10, 01:54
Posts: 1568
Hugs: 37623
Mood: Feeling bleh
Location: Doesn't matter >=)
I'm very pissed off at the moment but I'm trying to seem happy but I'm very annoyed.

It feels like I'm nothing again.

(0) (0)


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 08:06    


Knuffel Moderator
Ziaheart

Joined: Jun 22nd, '08, 18:31
Posts: 12326
Hugs: 243937
Mood: *fingers crossed*
Location: Canada
Why do I keep giving in?

(0) (1)


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 12:38    


Alith Anar

Joined: May 9th, '10, 19:29
Posts: 434
Hugs: 9395
Mood: Tired... *yawn*
Website: http://www.etsy.com/uk/shop/MissMoonshinesMakes
Location: England
I'm not coping, but I pretend things aren't so bad so I don't worry you...

(0) (0)
Please help me feed my knuffels :qh:

ImageImage

Questing!

Visit my Dice Shop?
Or buy me a coffee?


    Top
 Post subject: Re: Dirty Little Secrets...
Posted: Oct 21st, '14, 16:56    


moonlight_sonata

Joined: Oct 21st, '10, 01:54
Posts: 1568
Hugs: 37623
Mood: Feeling bleh
Location: Doesn't matter >=)
Sometimes wonder things :mcmeh:

(0) (0)


    Top
Display posts from previous:   Sort by  
   [ 2495 posts ] 
  • 1
  • 159
  • 160
  • 161
  • 162
  • 163
  • 250

You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum

Username:

Password:


I forgot my password

Avatar





It is currently Jun 23rd, '25, 11:21
All times are UTC+02:00