I was a social reject nobody wanted to be around, except one kid that I've known since we were babies. Then I turned 16, got a job, and had the joy of 30+ year old women on their third or fourth marriages telling me to never date yet giving me explicit sex tips and trying to lay hands on me and my underwear. Becoming a a teenager for me meant trading off the fist fights from kids to sexual harassment from adults. I spent a LOT of time alone in my room drawing and writing, and staying away from everybody in my teen years, and was definitely a factor of why I started practicing martial arts. Also a factor of why I quit when I was 17: got pinned down by a 61-year-old who was thinking about more than self-defense. I became such an asexual misanthrope for years.

wow you've had it tough. D:

Hotarla wrote: ↑Jan 12th, '25, 21:35 I’m glad I didn’t go through too much bullying. The little I did get was racism. :/ cuz kids are just like that, sighhh.

I was just the weird kid (autism and deliberately left unsocialized) with the weird clothes (small town thrift shop). Both girls and boys picked on me, and so did some teachers. It didn't help that as I got into junior high I took to trying to read through class instead of paying attention, and the I would sometimes lay into another kid or a teacher. I'm still amazed they passed me with the marks they did.

AsheSkyler wrote: ↑Jan 13th, '25, 04:07 I was a social reject nobody wanted to be around, except one kid that I've known since we were babies. Then I turned 16, got a job, and had the joy of 30+ year old women on their third or fourth marriages telling me to never date yet giving me explicit sex tips and trying to lay hands on me and my underwear. Becoming a a teenager for me meant trading off the fist fights from kids to sexual harassment from adults. I spent a LOT of time alone in my room drawing and writing, and staying away from everybody in my teen years, and was definitely a factor of why I started practicing martial arts. Also a factor of why I quit when I was 17: got pinned down by a 61-year-old who was thinking about more than self-defense. I became such an asexual misanthrope for years.

...I am SO grateful that I've only been groped ONCE, and the guy caught it for it. *hug*


I just was over exposed visually and verbally to the act as a child, so I'm pretty much anti-sexual. As in, I don't want to hear about it, and I don't CARE that I wouldn't be here if not for sex (which is what many people have informed me). But so many people act like the world is going to end if one old woman doesn't want to hear or talk or read about that stuff. What two consenting adults do in the privacy of their own room is supposed to be their own business. Yes. So stop trying to make it mine.

@ Hotarla:
Oh, that's just the light stuff. My tale gets much worse after I hit 20. @w@

@ Tam: I totally get the anti-sexual thing. It's really weird how people hyper-focus on that stuff, and then lose their minds when you're disinterested in it. Or the outright bullying when you're not interested, or have legit moral objections, like when I disagreed with a Sunday School teacher who thought it was okay to go into details about what male circumcision is to a room full of 10-year-old girls. I ended up having to start going to other classrooms because that teacher had a grudge against me after that and would openly mock me around other people. The extent of my interest in anybody's private life is that it's two biologically human legal adults of sound mind to give consent and they respect each other's boundaries. Anything beyond that is none of my business.

AsheSkyler wrote: ↑Jan 15th, '25, 02:51
@ Tam: I totally get the anti-sexual thing. It's really weird how people hyper-focus on that stuff, and then lose their minds when you're disinterested in it. Or the outright bullying when you're not interested, or have legit moral objections, like when I disagreed with a Sunday School teacher who thought it was okay to go into details about what male circumcision is to a room full of 10-year-old girls. I ended up having to start going to other classrooms because that teacher had a grudge against me after that and would openly mock me around other people. The extent of my interest in anybody's private life is that it's two biologically human legal adults of sound mind to give consent and they respect each other's boundaries. Anything beyond that is none of my business.

That teacher should NOT have been teaching children, especially not if male. But yeah. One of the reasons why I'm working my way out of bitterness toward the LGBTQ community is because it hasn't been the hetrosexual people who used to persist in telling me I couldn't be an old prude (I am, and slightly proud of it) and had to come out of the closet. But that was years ago now, and I need to let go of it so I don't wind up causing pain to people who just want to be nice friends.

Gonna change the subject now. I'm reminded of the shocked look on a gay friend's face when I went EWWWW after he pecked his SO goodbye, and I was like, "I say that about ANY kissing." I told the story later, and one of the ladies I told it to started laughing and said, "I'm a witness! She's done it when me and my guy kissed!"

On the other hand, for some reason seeing a husband and wife that I know love each other give just a gentle and loving hug to each other can fix a crappy day for me. I've even gotten to where I've asked complete strangers a couple times at the market to give hugs to one another. LOL The people I ask to give hugs to one another often tell me thanks, which makes me feel even better. *yes, I know, I'm weird. Hugs as spectator sport*

I think the best commentary I ever heard on same-sex parents was "you either get stuck with double the dad jokes, or trapped in an endless loop of 'go ask your mother'".

A lot of my bitterness on basically all the hot-topic political and sociopolitical stuff boiled down to the fact I just don't like fanatical zealots of any flavour. When you get away from the nutters and meet somebody normal, they're just an average person that wants to have a job that comfortably pays the bills, have an appropriate work-life balance that let's them enjoy family, friends, hobbies, and passions, and not be bothered by any controlling busybodies. I can deal with that. The first gay men and couple I ever knowingly met was when I worked at a movie rental store that had tanning beds in the back. These two would always buy a pack of gummy lifesavers candy after they finished tanning, and then pick out the one colour they didn't like and give it to me because I did like it. I also learned I am easily bought by gummy lifesavers. XD

Well I feel for all your experiences. Q3Q

Lol double dad jokes and endless ask your mother loops. XD sounds funny.

I remember when I lived in the group home after I tried suicide (over twenty years ago now), I was venting angry diatribe about two girls who wouldn't leave me the heck alone in high school, and one of my friends worriedly asked to talk to me. He was like, "I just wanted you to know that I'm gay." And I was like, "I know. You're not in my face, I don't care. You're the guy I gave a cat dolly to so you have a non allergenic cat." He was one of the first guys I wasn't afraid of, quiet and funny and earnest. Wish I could remember his name so I could pray for him better. I told him I was praying, because he was having pretty bad mental health junk just like me back then, and he was glad.

The guys I ewwed at were friends too, we'd chat for hours about plants and stuff. They adopted my baby ponytail tree, because I didn't have the light and space she needed.

a ponytail tree? question markkkk?

This by any chance?
If we get off on plants, we'll be here all day. I think I got like 30 scattered in and out of the office. Love my indoor jungle. :D